I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
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Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
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My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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