I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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