you're like a bully in the Christmas story
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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