I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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