im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
I don't deserve a penis
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag