I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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