just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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