Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
