just survived the first fart of the relationship.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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