I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
So many bounce houses so little time
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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