May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
