arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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