At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize