Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
And then my night got REAL pukey
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize