i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize