HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
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