Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
How naked do you want me to be?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
