Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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