They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize