she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
