youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
There r osticjed everywhere
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
