hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
