Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
its liver damage thursday
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
