So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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