halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
