you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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