I wannas sexs uuuuu
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
