Texts From Last Night

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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.

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  (502): Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall. http://tfl.nu/wfv4
  Replies (6) Good night (855) Bad night (2874) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.

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  (248): Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks. http://tfl.nu/vf46
  Replies (89) Good night (1277) Bad night (22235) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.

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  (201): halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them. http://tfl.nu/b2tk
  Replies (33) Good night (4622) Bad night (659) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home

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  (910): my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home http://tfl.nu/9si8
  Replies (17) Good night (838) Bad night (3694) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless

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  (724): his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless http://tfl.nu/7ms7
  Replies (22) Good night (921) Bad night (5266) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.

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  (512): If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department. http://tfl.nu/ppwl
  Replies (8) Good night (2517) Bad night (605) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea

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  (850): I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea http://tfl.nu/d42k
  Replies (18) Good night (5602) Bad night (841)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  She's clinging to me like a horny koala.

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  (425): She's clinging to me like a horny koala. http://tfl.nu/a9hq
  Replies (10) Good night (3283) Bad night (860) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  So squirting runs in the family.

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  (603): So squirting runs in the family. http://tfl.nu/x29o
  Replies (15) Good night (3791) Bad night (1262) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs

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  (815): I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs http://tfl.nu/01af
  Replies (6) Good night (1637) Bad night (743) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."

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  (716): As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is." http://tfl.nu/8j8j
  Replies (34) Good night (5641) Bad night (1183) Order T-Shirt
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?

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  (434): On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am? http://tfl.nu/gml1
  Replies (5) Good night (932) Bad night (492) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying

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  (208): I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying http://tfl.nu/lvtn
  Replies (8) Good night (448) Bad night (1259) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.

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  (617): So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan. http://tfl.nu/ggx4
  Replies (10) Good night (1389) Bad night (410) Order T-Shirt
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.

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  (307): He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style. http://tfl.nu/qafz
  Replies (6) Good night (962) Bad night (172) Order T-Shirt

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