I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
