i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
