girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I would ride that face into the sunset
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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