I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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