I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
