and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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