were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
smell my finger.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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