Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize