So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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