The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
