So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
