Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
