Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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