Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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