YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
