So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
A bitchslap is in order.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
