Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
