I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
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