So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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