i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
She swung at the pinata with crutches
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
