You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
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