There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
23 People Have Step Parents That Are Younger Than Them
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.