the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
