I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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